i have a project due on nov 1st and i havent even started, i need to procrastinate less. my leg is falling asleep too. very good last period doom also i have to pick up my tuba today bro which is like in 6 minutes and its hellish, thats just my life though.

good news?? ghost files season finale which isnt actually that good but another watcher show will start premiering (praying its 'too many spirits' bc they came out with 1st episode last week on monday)

(HELP ONE OF MY FRIENDS SAID "YES MA'AM" AND THEY ASKED FOR EVERYONE ELSE TO SAY IT AND EVERYONE ACTUALLY SAID IT)

week will be finished after i do trunk or treat at my sisters school yryeyayeyh

HIMARI UEHARA!!! this is late but i forgot her bday and i wanted to say a few words!! she was i think the first bandori card i got(?) it was so long ago i dont know if it was eve or her but i do remember it was the afterglow ghost set. lost the account tho lol. i've always loved her she is the best lesbian ever!! HER BIRTHDAY CARD IS SO CUTE TOO it just screams himari!! and yeah happy late birthday uehara <33

theres this aforementioned smart guy that sits next to me in class and he got a 92% on the test and i got 100%. big flex? ego booster? i think yeah.

IM AT MY BREAKING POINT BCAUSE I CANT HAVE ONE SECOND OF REASSURANVE here are things i dont want people to think abt me when they meet me

1. kindest bestest calmest person ever (online) i dont acrually know how you can get those vibes from me and it's only okay when my gf talks abt it and this makes me pissed ONLY because when i do something vulgar they don't expect that from me and are hesitant with me
2. quiet scary kid, i understand the quiet part but the scary part??? sometimes i give people rude looks and/or give people bad looks but i try my, i even tried dressing like a 2021 tiktok yt girl this year to attract more people?? i dont wanna seem scary
3. gay kid who only knows how to be gay, this is how i've alwyas been percieved and since im gay i also have to be the comedic relief which secreetly has depression but nobody cares enough to noytice or try to help. i disliek gays /j. im only writing this because one of my friends said 'honestly you're scary' and walked away and now i felt i really gotta write thjis to lose dead weight bc i couldnt have my moment i usually have and thas it smile

i will make bandori update soon too tyty

i'm having a crisis cause i cant decided whether i want to be lbh themed or mayoi themed

Today is horrible. First thing in the morning, I was putting away my stuff in my locker and these genius kid had the audacity to come up to me and talk about the monkey up on the lockers.

1. I don't care
2. THOSE ARE MY MONKEYS??? I LOVE THEM

I hit his backpack and then continued putting my stuff away, he ran off and came back to me a few seconds later and made a remark about my locker and how big it was, he went inside of it to prove what didn't need to be proved and I closed it and locked it up on him. I know, dumb, and I let him out 2 seconds later. After he came out though he said "That's rude!" in a childish voice and also said "I'm telling Mrs. C!" and I panicked. I put back my stuff in a hurry and what made me worry even more is that he ran to the teacher's location. I wouldn't care if it were any other teacher of if I were in elementary, but that teacher scares my badonkadonkers off. Per' say, I see that teacher in 7th period, I'm writing this in 5th and there are a few possibilities that could happen. BEST CASE:

1. He didn't actually tell her and was bluffing
2. She doesn't acknowledge it.
3. She doesn't believe him but still asks me and I say no, the problem with that would be they could ask students who saw and I don't get away with my historical lie. WORST CASE
4. Visit to the principal/APO, no way that's gonna happen..
5. Band D-Hall, means that today'll be my skip day, so I have to practice the rest of the week
6. Call home, me and my dad aren't on best terms right now so that's not gonna be good, on any other day that'd be in best case.
7. She tells me off/warns me not to do that, I kinda cry when people raise their voices at me so I do hope this isn't the case but it's better than the rest.

I hope that he was bluffing and he probably was, or Mrs. F is teaching today instead. I am a good student so worst cases aren't necessarily possible and won't even be justified for locking a kid in a locker for one second. I just have to lie really well if I do have to talk to her or tell the truth and come up with the most deliciously scripted apology.

And why am I writing this? Well nobody understands or cares enough, I'm having a crisis and have been at a very bad low so this situation is making me overthink to the point I have to write this in study hall to look back at after 7th and think "Wow, I was really anxious, good thing nothing happened!!" Or just cry at.

I hate Gavin. (I think that's how you spell his name.) Please take my arrogant situation as a laugh, because one thing that clears my mood after a teacher speaks to me in a rude tone is looking at my best friend who is beside me and we both giggle at that teacher's dumb remarks.

I'M BACK AGAIN@!!! I know crazy, i promised i'd do a somewhat daily update but i lied because i ended up with absolutely no time on my hanfds after school and even less time at school but.... IM BACK and i can say i'll be here for as much as i can. i told y'all i get (m)onitered so i have a limited word count to use, i'll try to keep friendly and just wanna update so u know i'm not absolutely gone forever and just a bit downturned and i'm pretty sure i got that cleared up last post.. i think the main reason is that i have found new special interests that aren't bandori so i kinda shifted away but lately i've wanted to rant so banpa will be my rant house. that is it. will update maybe tommorrow or later today or friday. and if i dont, well i will but bye 4 now!!!!!!!!

(ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY RINKO ILHSM SHE IS ONE OF MY FAVS OKAY BYE)

i lied

im bored and stressed out of my mind, it's 4th period and i'm in the gymnasium on the bleachers and my ass HURTS. today is also picture day which i always hated, when i was way younger i hated it bc i have to get into cute little dresses and years later i hate it even more because i have nothing to wear but i haaave to look pretttty bc it's my last year here!!!!!

school has been okay. it could be way worse, it is really bad but it's gonna be okay yeah yeah

home has also been okay, i don't hate anything there. also there's this weird guy sitting in front of me watching youtube shorts at his grown age did i mention he's weird everyone else has been nice to me, nobody hates me but i don't see anyone who has taken a liking to me. someone could still like me but ultimately, i dont care anymore lol

i'bve been fine and will write more when i want to; no promises and no dates

and i forgor to update again i promise today :3

will update everything in like 2 hours 👍👍