tfw you're extremely disillusioned by your shitty past experiences with the entertainment industry and it’s resulted in you being very cynical underneath the surface to the point where you feel like hard work and personal relationships don’t mean anything for your career, everyone is putting you on a pedestal, burdening you with high expectations, and expecting you to hide your weaknesses and be absolutely perfect, and since the vast majority of your peers at school see you as an untouchable celebrity kanon and kaoru were your only friends before you joined pasupare, and even then your present-day relationship with kaoru is strained because you feel like kaoru is putting on a false grandiose persona of bravado in order to hide her weaknesses and isn’t the person you used to know, yet half the fandom demonizes/mischaracterizes you as little more than a nasty coldhearted bitch who's rude to everyone