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November 25, 2020 03:05:04 +0000 (UTC)

iloveallbandorigirls

i present to u all: part 2 of "Kanon Matsubuffa"


After a brutal practice session, Kanon and Kaoru are taking a break at the cafeteria outside CiRCLE. They are eating Acai Bowl that has been oxidized and is crawling with plump maggots, because it is Level 1 Acai Bowl and the Gacha God in this game has not been updating the equipment. Nearby, some girls eating this food fall over and die. They explode, too.

“Kanon, a thousand foul whips of lightning upon my soul should I ever slight you, but the passion in my heart shall not rest until I ascertain the truth of the matter.”

Kanon’s face is heavy like a brick and she stabs her spoon into her bowl. The whole thing gets eviscerated and Kanon’s muscles are now throbbing and twitching. “…Oh, um. I guess no-one’s going to let me just be, huh? Frick. What do you want to know?”

Kaoru doesn’t see any of this, because her eyes are closed and she’s mouthing philosophy from Five Dialogues. “Oh, how the stars smile upon me! Kanon, do tell—what workouts must be done to acquire such… such glory? You are like a prince who has, has… erm… lifted a thousand moons, and—”

“If you really want to know,” Kanon jumps in, “You can come to the gym with me after we finish our studio session.”

“Is that so...?”

“W-well, yeah. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a big deal if you were all bigger, too. I mean, you all look like a bunch of w-wimpy babies anyway, so… fuee, I shouldn’t have said that… this raging testosterone is making me want to crush someone’s spine and consume living flesh, fueeeee~.” Twitch twitch, throb throb.

“Steel your nerves, jellyfish kitten. This is something we shall get through together.” They both fall silent and listen to the blended chatter of passerby. Some birds fly overhead, and the sun hasn’t a cloud to blot it out. Kaoru vomits because of the suffocating smell of the Level 1 Acai Bowl.

“Okay… thanks, Kaoru. You’re right. We’ll get through this together. Have you seen Kokoro anywhere lately? I need another of her wallets…”

“So, what sort of workouts might we partake in, Kanon? I fear my body may not be as well… suited, to such extreme displays of bravado, as yours might be…”

“Oh, um… hmm, I wouldn’t worry a lot about it. Before you know it, you’ll be even stronger than me, I think.”

Kaoru’s eyes twinkle at such a thought. She’ll finally have the physical strength to keep her ferocious kittens at bay.

If only Kaoru can pay but an ounce more of attention, she’d notice Kanon rubbing her hands together like a fly who is rubbing its hands together. Anyways, alas… such moments are fleeting full and full, for such a fool.